Today, Don gives us an update on the Matt Fisher vs. Progressive battle: apparently Progressive is getting killed on Twitter, as a result of their trying to weasel out of paying Matt’s family for the death of his sister. Joe even reads an email he got from a Progressive Claims General Manager, which sounds very robotic. After the guys hear Joe Biden stumble over his “Wall St. ” speech, Don and Phantom talk about last night’s episode of “Hard Knocks,” in which Chad Johnson got released. Don also plays an autotuned tribute to Julia Child, who would’ve turned 100 on Monday, and Steve plays his new parody song about Craig’s Grandma Bev.
We then get a visit from Janelle Pierzina, who was recently kicked off of “Big Brother.” Janelle tells us why, after her third time competing, she still can’t win, what it was like living in the Big Brother house with the other people on the show,and what she plans to do now. Slow Joe then plays a compilation of Craig’s pukes from yesterday, and then plays us the greatest commercials for the crappiest products ever, including “Baby Pee Pee,” and “Mr. Bucket.” We then see an ad for a product called the “Cuchini,” which hides a woman’s camel toe.
Don then interviews Chris D’ Elia, from the hit NBC sitcom “Whitney.” Chris, who is performing at Cobb’s Comedy Club in San Francisco Thursday through Sunday, tells us about working with Whitney Cummings, how Jo Koy helped him out when he first started, who his favorite comedians are, and even does an intro for Phantom News! After Chris, the guys play a couple rounds of “Helium Karaoke,” in which each guys inhales helium, and sings in their helium-induced chipmunk voice. It’s then time for the “Phantom News Hour.” Today, among the stories: Rashida Jones apologizes on Twitter for her John Travolta joke, the “Top 5 Funniest City Names in the U.S.,” and a kid gets disqualified from the Scrabble Championships for hiding a blank tile in his pocket. And of course, Don wraps everything up with a caller 100!