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Author Ellen Hawley's Tips On Moving Long Distance

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There are many reasons why someone would make the decision to pack up their current life and move halfway across the country, or even around the world. Many times a long distance move is forced upon an individual and their family when work proposes new opportunities in a foreign location. For others, a long distance move occurs when someone decides they want a change in scenery and a fresh start in life. No matter what your reasons are for moving long distance, there are things you need to do to prepare yourself, your family and your belongings before relocating. Ellen Hawley, author of the "The Divorce Diet," took some time to share her personal experiences and tips to help others considering making a long distance move.

Reasons

According to Hawley, the most common reason for people to move long distance is for work. Some are relocated or promoted with their current company, while others move to find a better opportunity with a new company. But in the end, the move is focused on advancing one's career.

The next two most common reasons are escape and love. "When I was 19, I moved from New York to Minnesota," Hawley said. "Not exactly to escape my family – they were good people, but they were also pretty overwhelming to a 19-year-old, and I could not imagine figuring out who I was if I stayed nearby."

After her move, she worked a job waiting tables and slowly built a new life in Minnesota. She decided to make another long distance move decades later when she and her partner fell in love with Cornwall, which is located at the southwestern tip of Britain.

Photo Credit: Thinkstock

Benefits

In addition to moving to a location you love or for a job, there are many benefits to making a long distance move. For Hawley, both of her moves have left her with mixed emotions – gratitude and regret. "Regret that I cannot share my daily life with people I love," she said. "Gratitude for the life that opened up in the new place."

The possibilities of what a new life in the new location can bring is one of the biggest benefits of making a long distance move. Hawley said that a new place can help break day-to-day patterns that make people feel like they are locked in a place.

"You can recreate your old life as closely as possible if you want," she said. "But you can also look for new interests, new people and new habits. It's a new morning. Rise and shine!"

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Location

Finding a new location to move to can be a difficult task, especially if you are undecided about where to move. To make the relocating decision easier, Hawley suggests visiting areas you would like to move to more than once. This way you are not trusting someone else's impression of the home or area or your faded memories from when you were a child.

While looking for a home, do some scouting around. Hawley suggest to take time to think about what matters to you and based on that, ask yourself the following questions:

  • What really matters to you?
  • What can you live without?
  • What will bring you joy?
  • Is there easy access to nature, to museums, to hospitals, to the ocean, to supermarkets, to model railroad clubs, etc.?
  • If moving to another country, do you speak the language, or can you learn it?

Here are top questions to ask yourself when looking to move to a new country:

  • Do you want to live in an expat community or become a part of the new country?
  • What are the health care and insurance systems like?
  • What are the work requirements for the area?

If looking to move to another country, Hawley suggests to do some research and look into everything possible about obtaining a visa and keep an eye on any changes that may come up. This is mostly because every country is different and some are making it increasingly difficult for immigrants to relocate.

"We almost got tossed out of Britain when our visa category changed and artists and writers were no longer eligible for indefinite leave to remain – the equivalent of a green card."

New Home

Since you are not in the area, finding a new home could be difficult, especially since you are not able to look around and get a feel for the home. It might be best to find a temporary home or apartment to live in while you do some home shopping post-move.

"We lived in a small temporary place for a year," Hawley said about her move to Cornwall. "It was beautiful, but got smaller and smaller as the year went on." But that year gave her time to find the perfect home.

"We started out with images of finding a 300-year-old-, rose-covered cottage with a view of the sea. Then we looked at prices and giggled hysterically. It was time for a rethink. We found a place that was much more down-market and much more affordable." She continued to say that their neighbors are great and they were able to stay in the community they wanted.

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Photo Credit: Thinkstock

Packing

Going through everything and deciding what gets packed, sold, donated or tossed can be overwhelming. Hawley suggest to start out by turning everything out of drawers and closets and consider it carefully.

"Then go get a cup of coffee and a brownie," she added. "Indulge in a good sulk for half an hour. Then go back and get to work."

Deciding what to bring with when moving long distance boils down to comparing and contrasting costs of shipping and replacing the items. Hawley said that shipping personal belongings can get expensive, but so can replacing furniture. All in all, it depends upon how expensive your tastes are, how much shipping costs are and how attached you are to the items.

Take time and care when packing items to be moved and/or shipped. Use additional padding, such as bubble wrap and packing paper to secure breakables in boxes and secure anything fragile in between blankets, pillows or clothing to keep safe while in transit.

"We ended up leaving most of our stuff behind and shipping a few things that had sentimental value," Hawley said. "So we did not feel like we showed up in Cornwall without a past. I miss a few things we left behind, but for the most part it is just stuff. It is amazing how little most of it means."

She suggests that if you plan to sell your items to consider a yard, house or garage sale. Auctions are also a great place to sell furniture and large items. She also suggested to think about these sales when looking for items. You may find someone selling items that are just as high quality and in good condition as the items you sold before moving.

Post-Move

After moving to a new location, you may find yourself fearing you made the wrong decision. This mostly occurs when you arrive and discover you do not know anyone and are unfamiliar with the area. Instead of staying at home worrying about your decision, it is important you get out of the house and meet people.

The more familiar you become with the area and your neighbors, the faster you will get settled, feel less depressed and get on the road to your new life.

Hawley found they were overly moved when opening boxes they had sent themselves during the move process. "Our old lives emerged – reminders of people we loved, and especially my mother, who had died not long before we moved. Having those bits and pieces in the new house felt like a confirmation of the new lives we were building.

Ellen Hawley is an American novelist and blogger who lives in Cornwall, England. Her novel, "The Divorce Diet," will be released by Kensington on December 31. Her blog, Notes from the U.K., explores the spidery corners of a culture and the things travel brochures ignore.

Heather Landon is a freelance writer with more than 20 years of experience. She has combined two of her passions - writing and travel - to share her experiences with others. You can read more of her articles at Examiner.com.

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