Don begins the day by talking about the tarps that fell off the scoreboard at Sleep Train Arena last night during the Kings game. He then discusses his voting procedure today, and calls in Bobby the Fish to talk about the exit polling he’ll be doing today. After going over the questions Bobby has to ask, Don sends him to La Entrada continuation High School. The guys talk a bit about the election, before Don plays some new parody songs about the election from Little Joe’s radio prep site.
Don then tells us about a Des Moine pizza delivery guy who peed on a woman’s door step after getting stiffed on a tip, and this gets Don talking about some of his greatest pee stories, including a heater, a Coke machine, and a lobster tank. He even throws in a few about G. Gordon Liddy’s incontinence secret. Bobby the Fish then calls in to give his initial tally, and as the show goes on, Don regularly checks in with him to get updated.
We then get a visit from Comedian Dave Attell. Dave, who is performing at Cobb’s Comedy Club in SF, talks with Don (who forgot that he’s been on the show 3 times already) about being in New York during the hurricane, and the havoc that has been wreaked upon the town. He also talks about working with Louis CK, Amy Schumer, and Anthony Jeselnik, before doing an intro for Phantom News.
After Don tells us it’s illegal to post pics of your ballot online, he introduces us to a new educational film, entitled “The Day We Spilled The Paint.” We then get a final count from Bobby the Fish, and then it’s time for the “Phantom News Hour.” Today, Phantom gives us the local ballot measures, tells us which states ban alcohol sales on Election Day, and introduces us to a lady who has been ordered to wear an “idiot” sign in public. And of course, Don wraps everything up with a caller 100!