cbs13headerlogo-1 SPORTS1140HeaderLogo gooddayheaderlogo (1)

TALE OF THE TAPE

Who Had More Luck In Europe? Jacksonville Jaguars Vs. The Griswolds

Hey gang! Let’s talk about lovable losers. This week, we’d like to compare the hapless Jacksonville Jaguars – a team so far down that some fans are urging for redemption at the hands of Tim Tebow – vs. the Griswold’s, the stars of the Vacation franchise. Both are known for epic fails and international incidents, but which of these two groups had more luck in Europe? Let’s go to the tape.

Jacksonville Jaguars
The Griswolds
(credit: Jamie McDonald/Getty Images)
(credit: Warner Bros. Studios/WBShop.com)
(credit: Jamie McDonald/Getty Images)
(credit: Warner Bros. Studios/WBShop.com)
Face Of The Organization
It was Blaine Gabbert. Now it’s Chad Henne. I couldn’t pick either out of a lineup.
Winner Pre-cranky old man, post-butthead Chevy Chase
Before Making The Trip To Europe
Have lost every game so far this year, often in embarrassing fashion.
Winner Somehow survived the Walley World debacle without so much as a lawsuit. Er. Spoilers, I guess?
Once They Got There?
Got decimated by the 49ers, 42-10, in front of a UK audience which they’ll be playing in front of for the next 3 years. Y’know. Just in case it becomes their new home in the future. Hypothetically.
Winner Got caught in an endless loop around Big Ben and Parliament.
And Then?
Reportedly, got into a fistfight with a bunch of locals. And lost. Badly.
Winner Destroyed Stonehenge.
And After That?
Practiced in preparation for...a bye week! A merciful bye week!
Winner Got to hang out in Paris.

The Winner Is

(credit: Warner Bros. Studios/WBShop.com)
Winner The Griswolds
5 out of 5

With a PERFECT SCORE of 5-0, the Griswolds win! Meaning the Jaguars STILL haven’t scored a victory this year. Neither against hooligans in the UK, nor against the fictional family of Chevy Chase. Yee-ouch.
-Brian Cullen, CBS Local Sports contributor

MORE TALES OF THE TAPE

  1. 90d3e409235628b134672e991d56d4cd_crop_north rs_560x415-140701161059-1024.tim-howard-world-cup-usa.ls.7114
    Tale of the Tape: Tim Howard vs. Jonathan Quick

    A goalkeeper is a designated player in sports who’s job is to prevent the opposing team from scoring by intercepting shots at the goal….Just in case you didn’t know that already. LA Kings goalie, Jonathan [...]

  2. (Photo Credit: Getty Images/Richard Heathcote) (Photo Credit: Getty Images/Warren Little)
    Tale Of The Tape: Winter Olympics In Sochi Vs. FIFA World Cup In Brazil

    With both sites having their share of issues in hosting major international sporting events, we went to the tape to decide who was the worst host of 2014.

  3. pc-140624-suarez-chiellini-jsw-220p_fe65ad26028adbda0a64e55bd0f930b9 Fight-1
    Tale of the Tape: Luis Suarez’s Bite vs. Mike Tyson’s Bite

    Some athletes will do anything win. Train, sweat, bleed and bite? Uruguayan soccer player Luis Suarez is biting his way to victory in this years World Cup. Suarez is under investigation for biting an Italian [...]

See All Tales of the Tape